View From the Eagles Nest

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Location: midwest, United States

I'm a follower of Jesus...I Love the Lord!Iam a artist,love to write,I have two grown daughters,4 grand childern.I enjoy traveling.this is my blog and I say what I think.if you dont agree thats dont have to read it.sometimes I deal with so much crap,I feel like a farmer.check out my new blog "willow in the mist."

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

some times I feel like a turdle.

have you ever wondered why your here?or if there is even a reason?well that is what I was thinking last night.things are soo weird in this world every one is scared cause of the signs of the times and all this weird crap going on.sin and murder and just plain perverted stuff going wonder what the heck will happen hope your family and the people you know will not be touched. by the just plain stupid things in the think do I have a reason for being here?you wonder if your at all important?then you think yah "me " important.what a laugh!!!life goes on with out the best of do the best you can and mess up any do the things you think you should and end up falling on your help people and they turn around and say that they did it do the best you can to be any thing and end up failing any way.I remember the story of the turdle and the was pretty told about a rabbit who was self abzorbed and thought highly of himself.and a old slow good for nothing turdle.and this the turdle desided he would give it a try and race the young hair.he figured it would be the rabbit who won any way cause he was fast and after all the turdle was old and slow.but he was up for the chance to see what he could early the next morning the old turdle and the hair,stood on the starting line.the rabbit with self pride oozing out stood and looked down his nose at the old turdle.the old turdle just smiled and when the gun went off the turdle took off frist.he slowly crawled over the line heading for the finish line.the rabbit lay down and rested.he talked to the people and he payed little if any attention to the old turdle.the turdle just kept slowly moving along eye on the finish line.but the rabbit was not worryed at all.he knew in his heart the race was he desided to take a snooze just 20 feet from the finish line and when the turdle came by the rabbit would jump up and cross the finish line in front of he ran ahead of the old turdle and lay down under a tree and fell asleep.the old turdle just kept moving along and doing his thing enjoying the day.and as he crossed the finish line he was amazed.his friend the rabbit was still sound asleep under the tree.the rabbits pride sunk his butt,and the turdles joy in life and just plain willingness to try got him to the finish line. I want to be like the turdle.I want to enjoy the race and see what I can do.if I win I win if I lose I lest I got in the race.that old turdle had alot working against him.but he had some thing the rabbit didnt.he had guts,and the rabbit over looked that.the turdle didnt think much of himself and the rabbit knew it.he tryed to use it against the turdle.but he forgot one thing.dont count out the under dog they will jump up and bite your berrys if you dont look out.the devil thinks for some reason I will lay down and die.I get low as a snakes belly in a well at times.but if you kick me when Im down I get pissed and get my second wind.and the old fool just keeps on pushing and kicking tell I raise with the Lords help and kick the snote out of him.the funny thing is you would think he would learn.but the Lord says he is dumb. and in my walk I have seen it more and more.why am I here ?who knows!all I know is time the Lord told me in my prayer time ,that he was going to use me.I thought good I would like that.but then he said this."I will use you to tell others what they dont want to hear.and you will get in trouble for it.but be faithful cause it has to be done.if you dont they will not hear it cause people are afarid to tell them the truth. yah like I wanted that!!!!who wants to be a bad news barer?well its gotten me in some deep doo.and I get sick of it.I had to get after mom a few times for things to get her back on her feet.she would get mad and get her fight back and show "me" as she put it.and today had to tell hubby to sign up for the SSI for himself.but he dont want it.he feels God should heal him the way he wants Him to heal pride is getting him in trouble to.the Lord said in my prayer time that "how can I help people who will not liston?I put ways to help out there.but people refuse to take it,tell they know more of their rights and then I can do more.its hard to tell people what they dont want to was hard for me to hear I was able to say things like they are instead of kissing butt.or lieing.but it dont make life easy. I would love to be still and not say nothing.just do like others and smile and say OOOO.and then talk about it behind your back. you stay so much safer.but if you are told to say something to some one for the Lord you dont get away with keeping your trap shut.I hate sleepless nights tosing and I finely do it.if in fact it is the Lord.some times I get tee,d off and say things or say things when I m having problems and dont think when doing it.get that from my mom,s and Dads side of the family.but when its from the Lord I know it.and I dont feel like doing it.I heard about a family who have a daughter who has the same mess hubby has.the poor family was run ragged and at their wits end.well finely to save them going down with her they needed to put her in her own apartment.her problems had contraled the family for years.finely the girl had to deal with it on her own with those who knew how to deal with can be hard but it comes down to the peace and lack of stress in the home and family.I pray soon I can be able to do some thing diffrent for the tell people good news about them selves all the time.but aint change since he told guess I aint out of the dog house yet.O yes it works for me to.He tells me things I dont want to hear to.and he dont beat around the bush eather.but he also dont let those he is trying to speak to brush it off.He uses ones conscience. thanks for reading. Posted by Picasa


Blogger Merle said...

Hi Leann ~~ I am so sorry that you have had so many problems, and glad that some have worked out OK. Keep on
smiling and living a good life, and it will turn out well for you. THanks for your visit and comments. I was so
sorry not to get to my cousin's funeral today, but there were others there to comfort her sister, my main concern. Take care Leann, Love, Merle.

11:13 PM  
Blogger Anna said...

Mom your an awesome woman and have great qualities and you do tell others the way you see it and even though sometimes it ticks me off, it is one quality I love about you. I agree we do need to say the truth to people(and we have) then we need to put it in the Lords hands and let him do what he can. And I do agree things get said behind peoples backs (everyone has been guilty of this at some point in time everyone)its not right but it does happen....You have always told me when dealing with the kids and the hubby, that saying things over and over again do no good, your words "say it to the Lord he is the only one who can change things, you can't you'll just make yourself sick trying". This was the best advice mom hard to do sometimes but it has worked.. You have been a great teacher, mother and friend, Lucy and I have both made mistakes, but there ours to make, just be there with love and prayers when we do. I know you worry and want whats best for us, and we would expect nothing less from you. No matter where our lives bring us ,we will be ok as long as we have those we love standing beside us and yes silently praying if necessary but beside us none the less....I dont like to say things on here but I have to, I think our personal private family issues should be kept just that personal and private, I think thats the best for all concerned...
I think you have a great thing here mom you reach many people, you wanted a way to show your faith and how the Lord has worked in your life, let that be your mark on here..
Hang in there and know God is working in this family,there has been many good this along with the bad. God will works things out to the good for all concerned. This I beleive..
I love you

9:04 AM  
Blogger Leann said...

the thing is Anna I have already heard this and had already done something about Like I said to Jessi and Lucy "if you stire a bucket of crap it stinks."so your telling me what I already know!in other words too little to late.and if you dont tell your problems and share how God gets you out of it.then your no diffrent then the church fokes who have problems up the yeng yang. and say O yes amen Im fine and all is well.when in fact all hell is breaking lose all around them but they dont want any one to have a ministry you have to know what others are going through.if you set and have no problems and hide them then what do you have to help others with?.like perez said on the blog."how would someone with a perfect life help me?"the girl is smart.see the diffrence between me and the rest of the family is I m not afarid to tell others my mess ups.and yes your problems Ill keep out of here unless it affects me to.then maybe this family will think real hard before they screw up.the thing is when you have realy asked the Lord for forgiveness and dealt with your screw ups.then they no longer bother you.but when your still playing with them and in the middle of the sin and trying to walk both sides of the fence your afaird to be honest about your self.the only way some one can be helped by anyone is by being honest.or how do they know you been there done know you cant pick your family.your put where God wants you.Lord knows if I had had the chance Id have been born to a chic 5 foot seven with lovely blonde hair and long legs and blue I would have had a fighting chance in this world.but instead I was born into the short stubby people club.but I am me because of who I came from. and the people I came from must have had some thing good to put in me or the Lord wouldnt have put me in their family. I say all that to say do know there will be a book?you do know I will tell the truth?or do you want me to white wash it?the Lord said this family will have a ministry.well to have one you have to be honest.and people wont liston to a person with no problems.they would say your life is perfect what the heck do you know about my problems?so yes I hear you and yes I know what your saying.but one day all this familys dirty secret crap is going to be there for all to see.and if your not willing to be honest then you will surely not be much good to any you will have to explain to me how I can be honest, and cover up the dirty little secrets.and you do remember the word."be sure your sin will find you out."well if any thing this last few years have surely proved that word true.there is dirt coming out from under the rug as we speak.and you know it wont end tell we are all safely you and Lucy and the rest of the family. need to explain to me and the Lord, just how we do this?or you need to ask the Lord to get you out of this family some how.cause other wise I dont know how you will be in the book or the ministry.and you do remember the boys have callings on their lives.and they aint even started their lives yet.and you know pasters kids or pasters end in the news every day.they are foober for the news media I know you try to help but maybe you should do as FPN said "hold people acount able for their screw ups."you have "me" now its time for every one to be held.this family has gone through some herendous messes in the last few years some my fault.and the damage has caused waves that will keep going for years to come if some thing is not done fast and now.but I cant do any thing but prayer.but there is a problem there.see its a head of the family thing.each house hold needs to take care of their own home.and they need to be able to stand up in the rights the Lord gave them.but if they dont know those rights,or are still messing with useless religen they are in deep doo.cause my prayers or any ones for them is hit and miss cause they have free will.and your free will can get you killed and jipped big I said all this to say this.I hear you but all I can do is be honest and try to not care any more.thats the only way I can stop being a mother or grandma.cause other wise I will speak up when I see a mess brewing.I will say something!!I wonder if some one will step up in the other parts of the family if things need to be faced if the Lord gets me out of here.and that scares me.will there be some one with a big mouth who wont be afaird to tell the truth?maybe TJ he isnt.maybe he is my replacement.the Lord called me out of my family. when my Dad or his brother or none of the others would.and TJ was the frist one the Lord said would be maybe it is him.the Lord calls those who are willing.He dont call us cause we are some great person of God.He calls you cause He knows with out Him you will fall flat on your face.if He is calling TJ its cause He sees a Man who will do as He asks cause of some thing in side him.but its not a easy life.believe me I are on your own with only the Lord to see you through.even if some of the family say they are I will surely pray for TJ cause He is going to need it.He knows He has a calling on him.and it scares him.and it should.its a big job.I dont know all the details of the plans the lord has for this family.but He will hound us till its you dont getout of doing what your supose eather buck up and do it or sit and spin a while.believe me I have sat and spinned and it aint I do it as soon as the Lord askes if I can.cause I hate the hot breath on my neck.and it aint the Lords.He has you do things by trusting your love for Him to move you.yes God will work all this out to the good for this family,I believe it to.but He has alot to do with us yet to get us where we need to be to get that good in place.He isnt holding us back we are holding Him back. Love you to.

11:44 AM  
Blogger Blondie said...

I know that feeling like a turtle feeling and it ain't fun. I hear what you and anna are both saying loud and clear and frankly, don't have the answers for either one of you. You both bring up valid points and coming from a dysfunctional family with lots of their own stuff to deal with, I am not one to talk. I have found that keeping my mouth shut is a good thing sometimes, but also can be bad at other times. It builds resentment, tension, and heartache and sometimes makes the situation worse for all concerned. Well, I always pray for everyone and I know I tell you this, but please know that you do make a difference in so many peoples lives. Take care and God bless you.

9:32 AM  

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