View From the Eagles Nest

Matthew 23;24....Luke 13;34.... The joys and blessings of a fat chick in a skinny world. Faith for the journey, hope for the future, the beauty of nature, wilderness roads, life in general, family, the past and present, from the memory of a country girl stuck in the big city...SEX...now that I have your attention visit my blog...

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Location: midwest, United States

I'm a follower of Jesus...I Love the Lord!Iam a artist,love to write,I have two grown daughters,4 grand childern.I enjoy traveling.this is my blog and I say what I think.if you dont agree thats fine.you dont have to read it.sometimes I deal with so much crap,I feel like a farmer.check out my new blog "willow in the mist."

Saturday, June 02, 2007

big foot siteing .....



miss Big foot and little teddy bear siteing in northern midwest county.
early thursday morning sheriff winslow of bear creek county said he was driving along a country road when he seen miss big foot and a little bear sitting in a house together.the home is owned by some friends of his who were working.so he desided he better check it out.
shreiff winslow with gun drawn walked up to the house and pecked in the window.little bear and miss big foot were changing channels on the tv trying to find some thing to watch.little bear said he wanted cartoons ,racing or wild kingdom..

miss big foot said she wanted the home shopping channel or christain tv..or furry hunks..
sheriff winslow stood out side the window dumb founded as he listoned.
little bear was mad cause he said he didnt like the nail polish miss big foot had on.he said he would be ashamed to be seen out side with miss big foot...miss big foot said she needed to have the red toesnails so she could hide in the strawberry patch and eat...
little bear said he didnt mind the color of the polish as much as he hated the razer sharp toenail on the left foot.
miss big foot said being a hot chic she needed it for protection.if anyone tryed to attack or hurt her she could stick out that sharp toe nail and do some major damage on their person!!!
little bear said it sounded like a good plan to him.
poor sheriff winslow didnt know if he should arest the two or just chase them out.so he called his friends who own the house, to see what to do.
the lady of the house said it was ok to leave them in the house.that she often had to ask miss big foot to watch little teddy bear.she said that he was their little dog and only looked like a little bear.
sheriff winslow feeling alittle ashamed said he didnt know big foot made house calls.
the lady of the house said O yes any time I need to have some one watch the house and little teddy bear miss bigfoot comes on the double..
we only need to serve pizza or chocolate and miss big foot is there.
why just yesturday miss big foot had me polish her toes so she could go eat strawberrys with out being seen.
sheriff winslow said he was sorry for calling his lady friend at work..and he would be going now.he said he would talk to her later.he had another report he had to follow up on.
this has been the first big foot siteing in bear creek for a long time.and the very first miss big foot siteing.
this reporter asked the sheriff what he felt when he saw the big foot..
sheriff winslow said he didnt feel safe knowing that bigfoot could hurt people with just one swipe of her toenail.he hoped that this big foot was gental.

bear creek is a nice little commuity and this siteing of big foot has caused a stir in the county.bigfoot hunters from all over the country have come to bear creek to see if they can site one.the mayor Anna Brinkman says its good for our little village.
sheriff winslow is not too sure.because he has been getting complants from local stawberry growers in the county..they say that in one night strawberrys that were ripe were gone by the next morning...
sheriff winslow knows its miss big foot but doesnt know what to do.he said he is thinking of leaving pizza and chocolate candy near his friends home where he frist seen miss big foot.then maybe he can catch miss big foot.but he is afraid she may injur him with her sharp toenail if he gets her in a trap..
this reporter thinks its best to let strawberry eating big feet alone.
Well kids I just had to do that.its been a long time sence I put a big foot siteing on the blog.hope it gave you a chuckle.if you like them or hate them you can vote.if you like them then Ill do more.if you hate them I may do them anyway.but vote any way.
I was as you can see at Anna,s for a few days.I sure needed to get away.had a nice time with them.teddy was busy sitting by me and enjoying him self.Anna and I checked out places near her.I may move if I find a nice ground floor place.one bigger then this one.I love the view here but its getting less and less.cause the trees will be up to the window in a year or two.and my lovely view will be of the tops of tree,s.so I need to find a place I like.
I been praying about it and I believe its getting time to move.it would be nice to get closer to Anna and the family..and get on the ground floor and have a garage to put my van in.winter is getting hard to clean the van off alone.
the one place has a patio and nice yard with flowers and stuff.its ground floor and from out side looks bigger then mine.and has a garage for the van.and has washer and dryer huck ups in the apartment.boy I could handle that.now I have to haul all my stuff down 7 floors to go wash.so this place would be what I been looking for.so I need to see if this is the place the Lord has for me .
I would love to move into my own home but at this time dont see how.so if it will be a while then its time to find a stepping stone till the home comes.

I talked to my sister in law the other day.the poor girl most likely wished she hadnt called.I was in a low mood and needed someone to talk to.wish I hadnt talked to her now.but its too late.I hate to talk to people when I am low.it only makes it harder.and I cant really say how I feel cause some of it is because of her brother.so I cant say much..I been dealing with alot of the past of the whole thing.
and now that Iam getting better the anger is coming from it all.where first I felt like a failor and hurt and just plan sick.now Iam tee,ed off.
I deserve better then what I got.and it tee,s me off to know where I treated him like a treasure and loved him and wanted the best for him.prayed 17 years for him to be free from the life style.
when nitty came to gritty and I needed him.he folded and run off on me.for six months I didnt know what to do to get back on my feet.and when I did finely get almost back on my feet.then he calls and says he loves me and wants to come home.and before that he had left cause he said he didnt love me like he should.well the one month he was back showed me that it was a good thing he had left.cause the one who came back wasnt the one I had loved.and the one I had loved who knows where or who he was!!!
any way I been dealing with this moving on and letting go.and its hard.I dont want to bad mouth him.cause he was some one I loved.but it just makes me so up set some times.I had been waiting for 18 years believing God had someone for me.and then this mess.
its not Gods fault!!!
everyone has free will.and I most likely have really bad taste at picking men.I should have known better then to get married again..my step mom is a wise woman.she said along time ago."why in the "he--"would you want to get married again????you have it made!!!!.
you can come and go as you like.you can cook or not cook,clean or not clean,sleep with out being bugged for sex if ya dont feel like it!!!why on earth would you get married again???and she is smart.
I been married 3 times looking for love.and every time I been treated like crap...I know Iam no prise and look like crap..but I would love to be loved and have someone of my own.but I pick guys who dont value me.hubby was a nice looking guy and younger then me.and he was easy to love at first.but when you marry one man and he disapears and some stranger shows up in his body.how the heck do you stay around.and as long as we were loving the same person"him"we were doing ok.but when he wasnt the center of attention it no longer worked.I feel that hubby needs his family and a whole monteroge of people to get the attention he needs.one person could never keep him happy.he needs too much attention.he has to be the bell of the ball.the shining star.the number one.no one can step into the lime light.or he gets alittle to uneasy.

my daugther said she could see it when we were there the last time we were together.he was upset cause he wasnt in the lime light.the kids were talking to me and we were laughing. and she said hubby was not pleased with it, she could see it on his face.
we always made sure he was in on every thing.but for some reason he wanted more.he wanted to be the main one.
I remember when we went down to see the grandgirls.they always use to set by me on the couch.one on each side with my arms around them.well when hubby and I got together we sat close.and the girls would take truns sitting next to my left side.well after he left the girls were use to sitting by me again.so when he came back for the month.we were down there.and the youngest girl said can you please move over so I can sit by my grandma.
he was not too pleased.he acted as if she was being un fair.he even made a sound.and when she got up to go to the bathroom he moved back.and when she came back she said can you please move so I can sit by my NaNa..he moved and I said to him whats the matter with you are you lone some or some thing???he just said well we sit togehter.I said I see my granddaugthers very little so I think we can sit like this for a while.I love my grandgirls and they love me.
when he left me they were very mad at him.the youngest one said mommy you call NaNa and tell her to come stay with us we love her..they didnt know why their grandpa would leave..and it was hard to explain.and when they seen him he hadnt been the same person after his break down.so they didnt trust him any more.they still wanted to be able to play with him and talk to him.but he wasnt the person they learned to love.so they were confused and scared.and I dont blame them.cause their NaNa was scared and confused to.
so the man who I love is gone.and someone I dont even know was with me for a while.and I needed to see the man I loved is gone and he isnt coming back..
the great love I felt for the man is gone.and the future I longed for with him is gone.and I need to go on.
the Lord has been my only strength and place of safety.he is the one who helped me see that if you dont give up the past it can draw you back in.
hubby had his own free will.he desided that some of his past was better then what he had with me.and the things we were waiting for from the Lord ,were taking too much time to come to pass.so he choose to let some of the junk he was into come back.and its then that the bottem fell out.
so Im getting to the place where its over and I need to get the rest of the emotions out and leave the past behind.hubby is not the man for me.he isnt able to be.

I needed someone who loved me.someone who could see the good in me and the needs I had.to be there for me when I needed a strong shoulder to leen on when my mom died.I needed someone who could be loving and understanding.someone who could value me as much as I valued them.I was there for him tell he left me cause he didnt want to be here.and when he left he not only walked out of my door he walked out of my heart.when he left he stood at the side of my chair while tears ran down my cheeks.and he looked at the view out the window for a long time.then he said I will miss the town and all the lovely spots around here.he said I may go and say good by to them..
when he walked out the door all he said to me was goodby.I thought well guess I see what he really loved.the town the view and the places he liked.it showed me then how much i ment to him.I wasnt what he would miss.the place is what he would miss..
he once told me he never missed anyone...I couldnt under stand that.how do you not miss some one you have been with?even when I was divorced form the other two I missed them.I cared what happened to them.I didnt like what had happened but I missed what had been at one time.
well when he left it was six whole months before I heard any thing form him.so guess he dont miss anyone.and I dont need a man who can walk away and never even care if I live or die.I called to ask his mom if he was ok.and she wrote and told me.that is how I cared but he just went into himself and nothing or no one was important but him.
well Iam moving on.and I dont need a person who is too into himself to care about my needs.he told me some men at the church told him he was selfish.and when he told me at first i was kinda mad at them for saying that.but you know they hit the nail right on the head.he is selfish..the only person hubby really loves is hubby.
I wish him well and hope he finds his way.I was hoping we could be friends yet.but why have a friend who could give a crap about you. Im better off letting the Lord find me one who is a real friend.I have had too many of the kind who dont care.

some friends I have called and cared about for years.tryed to stay in touch with.but they never call me in return.they are nice people.and i pray for them.but it seems they dont care if I live or die.for a long time I figured there was some thing wrong with me.some thing i was doing or not doing.but the Lord said one day."if people care really care about you they stay in touch.and if they dont then let them go.and I will replace them with those who do care".and he has..one good friend is better then a whole bunch of bad ones.
Im tired of feeling like Im some bad person or not worth much.people have been able to do that to me for years.well Im not going to take it any more.I have a caring heart and I care about the people I know and pray for them.even if they dont care about me or keep in touch.I still care and pray for them.if they dont love me and care to stay in touch then they arent real friends any way.and Im better off with out them.
I may be fat and not the best looking chic in the world.but Iam valueable.cause the Lord died for me.and if he loves me who cares if no one else does.after all he is a better hubby then any man on earth.and Isaiah 54 says so!!!!and a history with him has proved that to me.so if Iam alone with no hubby then Jesus is my hubby.so Im never really alone!!!!!
the past is past.its a big mistake I made and I need to move on.and with the Lords help today I do!!!and if God has some thing for me then he can lead me to it.but for now Im no longer someones wife in my heart,only on paper..and one day when the Lord says its time I wont be on paper eather..
thanks for listoning to my ranting.I needed to talk to someone.and lately I find it easyer to talk by writing.so its easyer to put it here.
I may have some sister in laws who read this yet.well thats ok.its time I had my say in what went down.and its best if it comes from me .instead of some smiling face who is trying to win your attention back..
the hubby needed his family and now he has them back.he always had to fight to get the attention.and it hurt him more then you know..he is diffrent as you all know.he got into a life away from home that was spoken over him by brothers and school friends for a long time as a kid.yes he liked art,and was soft spoken,it didnt make him what he was called.but it did help to get him to wonder.and that opened the door.its funny how name calling can effect young kids.its one of the reasons there are so many diffrent people who end up in lives they really dont want to be in.only cause those around them didnt understand their being diffrent.and hung a name on them that didnt fit..
Iam diffrent to.Iam not a woman who is danty and lady like.I have had to be stronge in life or it would have run me over.God knew I needed to be stronge to servive.he gave me wisdom to make chooses to help my girls and me.he gave me wisdom to be able to fix things on my own cause he knew I would be alone.he helped me be a mother and father to my girls cause the real father wasnt one.he helped me to pertect my girls.and when I lay down alone after the day was through,and Id cry myself tosleep cause it was all so hard being alone.he held me and loved me!!!!he stood by me just as I was.he told me he would never leave me or forsake me.he was the one who provided
for our needs.he held me all these years when a man wasnt strong enough to.he was my rock and my stronge tower.he is my husband when I have none.and I love him,he is the treasure I been sreaching for all my life.he is the love I looked for in men.
I know now you cant find it in any man but him..they dont have the love only he can give.
thank you Jesus you are the breath of my heart.I will love you all the days of my life.
and I will never look for love where it cant be found again.
the past has showed me that what I looked for in humans is only in you.
and from this day on I will trust only you and your love.
cause I know it will last.....

thanks for reading to all my blogger friends.I know its long and kind of heavey.but its been along time sence I posted.and mainly cause I was geting me back!!!and I had problems finding her for a while.
any way thanks for being faithful on my blog.I know you all have busy lives and blogs of your own.Iam truely blessed to have you as blogging friends.pray that God will heal my heart and help me to move on and grow.cause if I cant make it through the fires and floods in my life.I will not be able to comfort those the Lord sends my way.
so I need to be able to express here in honesty and openess the truth of how God helped me.
some people think its smart to hide their problems.and to cover up family secrets.but to be honest it only gives the devil more to work with.a smart friend once told me"your only as sick as your secrets".
and it is so true.how can people be helped by you if you lie or cover over what God did to help you.
if Iam not willing to tell the truth of the dumb mistakes I make then how is anyone going to see how God helped me.if they didnt know I screw up to begin with???
so I will share with you the ups and downs of my life.and how the Lord gets this old chic out of them.
if by telling you ,I help one person to see Jesus.and learn to see he is faithful .
then I have done something with my life exspet just live it.

Have a great weekend,and hope your all enjoying this lovely weather..
IM SENDING YOU MY LOVE...
(((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))
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6 Comments:

Blogger Kathy Finfrock said...

The new apartment sounds wonderful. I hope you get it.
As for your mistakes in the past, sometimes we all don't make the best of choices. It's part of what makes us who we are and as long as we learn from it, don't repeat those unwise choices, we should own them. The key is to move forward. Thank you for sharing.

10:16 PM  
Blogger Raggedy said...

We have all made our share of bad choices in relationships.
I sure have made mine too!
Huge hugsss girlfiend.
Keep on keeping on.
I am sorry I have not been around as much as I would like. Medical is preventing me from posting and visiting.. I am going to be away again after Monday.. I will try and make it back as soon as I can...
My thoughts and prayers remain with you.
Huggles and Love,
Raggedy

12:32 AM  
Blogger Leann said...

kathy;thanks for your friendship.and for being a faithful blog friend.God bless.

raggedy;thanks for your prayers and hugs.sorry to hear you been having problems.I will keep you in my prayers.Jesus heals he healed me of cancer when they had only given me 3 weeks to live.Jesus said I wasnt going to die and I believed him.
God bless you.
(((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))

11:32 AM  
Blogger Merle said...

Hi Leann ~~ We have all made mistakes in our lives, you are not the only one. We just have to try to do better
and find happiness where we can. You
are so lucky to have such faith in the Lord to comfort you. You deserve better than you got. The new place
sounds wonderful, so I hope you can get it Leann, or another like it.
I wish you happiness for the future.
Take care, glad you liked my post. Love, Merle.

12:22 AM  
Blogger Stephen Newton said...

Thanks for sharing all that difficult personal stuff. It definitely helps others to know what you've been through. It sounds like you are on the mend and perhaps stronger for it.

As we get older, the past does catch up with us in sometimes very cruel ways. You're right, you do deserve to be happy!

10:30 AM  
Blogger Leann said...

thanks everyone for stopping by to read my blog.and for your kind words of comfort.its helps to vent some times.and I needed to badly.your all good blogging friends.God bless you all.((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))

4:50 AM  

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