a candle in the window / the Lamb of God.

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL OUR TROOPS AND THEIR FAMILYS...there is a flame in the window for all of you tonight.you are loved and your in your countrys prayers.angels watch over everyone and cover them with peace this christmas and get them home safe...
thank you for what your doing..God bless you all.

isnt this the cutest picture?I love to collect mice,not the real ones the colloctor ones.I have a lot of them.my kids gave me some and I picked them up at diffrent times.they make me smile.

the lamb of God...

( short story for my blog family for christmas.)

mic stood out side the store,and looked in at all the lovely christmas decore.the tree,s were covered with lovely ornaments and doves and holly.and here and there among the branchs were small real birdnests nesled next to pretty blue birds.the trees were the prettyest ones mic had had seen so far this year.

he turned back to skan the side walk but only a few people walked past and none of them were mary.he had missed seeing her for the last few years.they had been friends for way over a life time he guessed.they had known each other all their lives.mic thought of the years as they had passed .it seemed mary and he had always been together.

they were infact more like brother and sister then friends.well the best of friends anyway.

he could look back and see them as far back in time as his memories went.his mom and marys mom were childhood friends to.and their familys had always taken trips and had partys together.

and for all of their lives they had lived next door to each other. that is till mary had gone to collage and mic had gone to one out west.they had kept in touch all through the years till they both finished their schooling.

but then some thing changed and mic had been busy with his new found love .and mary and he had drifted apart.she had moved to a small town near home and was a lawyor.mic had gone on to be the doctor he had always wanted to be .he had moved to and small town in the mountains..

his life had meaning and he felt he was doing some thing for man kind.he didnt make the big money he had hope to but he felt it was best to be a healer not a money maker and his people loved him.

but for all the good he was doing ,one night had changed his life.he had a little girl he was treating and he had fallen in love with her as his own child.he was happy to be able to help her get better.but then some thing went very wrong.she had rallyed and gotten better and then went down hill fast and died in his arms.mic was devstated.

he had to go away for a few weeks to get his head back on.he couldnt even face the mother and father.he had come into the room and told them he was so sorry and almost ran from out of the room,before they were able to say it wasnt his fault.

he left the hospital after telling his staf he wasnt going to be in for a few week,s and to cancel all of his apointments.

he had packed his bags and headed into the mountains to his cabin.it was fall and he knew he could walk the mountain trails and sit in the high meadows and be once again able to see the meaning of why he became a doc in the frist place.

but the frist week there only made him feel more alone then he had ever felt in his life.he wondered around the cabin as if he were a ghost lost in time.

he walked out side now and then and sat on the bench over looking the valley.but most times he didnt even see the beauty all around him,all he saw was the face of little missy..and the smile she had on her face as she passed on.he couldnt see how a child could be so happy and loving when she was so sick.

but she had her little lamb, stuffed animal always close to her and she would say.

doctor mic this little lamb reminds me my best friend Jesus is always with me.and she would giggle and smile from ear to ear.her big brown eyes flashing with love and pure joy.

just the thought of it now brought tears to his eyes.he couldnt even say any thing to her cause he didnt believe in God.

he had seen so much in collage and been told so much of how the bible couldnt be true cause of this or that.he just had smiled at her.but the night she died he would never forget what she said to him.it was a grown up talk from a very small child.and it had cut him to the heart.

the parents had gone home to get their things to stay with her.and mic had come to say good night to her.hoping beyound hope the next morning would find her better.

he had come in to the room and her face lite up when she seen him.she said doctor mic can you hold me till Mommy and Daddy come back.

he had come to the bed and picked her up and sat her on his lap.and as he did she said close to his ear as she lay her head on his sholder.I want you to keep lamb for me so he dont get lonesome.and he will help you to remember Jesus loves you and is with you .and please doctor mic will you talk to him,cause he misses you.

and with that she had layed her head down and said tell mommy and Daddy I couldnt wait till they came back.Ill see them later.

he sat there for a while .he held her till the nurse came to check her.as she reached to do so she looked at mic and said O Iam so sorry.mic looked at her as if she was crazy or some thing.then he relized it.missy was gone.the lamb fell from her little arms and hit the floor.and the room and time stopped in mid air.

his chest felt like a vice was crushing him to death.and at that time he wished it did.he sat there unable to speak as the nurse took missy from his arms and said she would tell the family she was gone.he said he would if she would tell him when they came.he picked up the lamb and put it on the bed.he couldnt keep it.

he walked down the hall to a large broom closet.and went inside and broke down.he had never cryed like this in his life.he felt as if his heart was being ripped from his body and he wish he would die right there.he sat for a few minutes in the quiet of the dark closet.and then he said.if I didnt believe in you before I sure as hell dont now.how could you take a sweet child like her.she loved you.I will never believe there is a God,not after tonight.

he stood up and walked to the nurses desk.and she said the family was in the room with missy saying good by.he hated to go in but he after all was her doctor.and he had been the last one to speak with her.so he mustred up the strength he needed and walked in.

Patty, missys mom sat with her little girl in her arm,s.and she was praying.mark missys father was crying softly in the chair near by.

mic tryed to speak but tears ran down his face.he told them what had happened and what missy had told them .and he was going to run.but with out a word patty handed lamb to him and said two days ago missy said mom I want doc mic to have my lamby cause he looks lonely,and he needs Jesus love.with that mic ran out the of room.

now as he sat in the mountains he wondered how a child could know he was the lonelyest man in the world.he had it all,every thing he had wanted but he was still lonely, and didnt know why he was here.

he looked up to see a pair of eagles soring on the up drafts.effertlessly they circaled and dived as if they owned the heavens and they did.he watched as they flew to the rocky crags and what looked like a nest.he wondered if they had young?he looked down into the valley and seen homes off in the distance and wondered if happy people with healthy happy children lived there.and he cryed long and hard for the little angel who had tounched his life but would never be able to live her,s. and again he yelled out in side his hatered for a God who could kill a small child.

and as he sat he heard a small quiet voice say."I loved missy to.and I didnt kill her."mic sat straight up right and looked around.then when no one spoke he brushed it off.

he walked to the high pass and along the ridge till he came back to the cabin.he took in some wood for the night and put it in the wood box by the door.and readyed things for a meal of chicken he had picked up before he had come home the day before.he warmed it in the oven.and as he waited for it to be done,he walked out and sat on the screen porch.the wind was sweet with pine sent and fallen leaves.

as he sat enjoying or trying to enjoy the evening he said to himself.why would a God if there was one send a child like missy only to take her away so soon.the wind blew in and touched his face and brushed his hair into his eyes.and he heard the voice say" to reach you."

mic stood to his feet and yelled at no one and said stop this.dont blame me for her death,I did all I was able to save her,where were you!!!!!if your God where the hell were you?????all became still and he walked in as the buzzer went off on the stove.

he eat his supper and felt alittle uneasy.was he losing his mind hearing voices,no" a voice."he was afraid to even think or ask himself questions for fear he would hear it again.he desided to read after supper.but as he tryed he couldnt even remember what he read even thow he had reread it three times.he throw the book across the floor.

he got up and walked to the window and watched the last rays of the sun go down behind the mountain.and watched the chic a dee,s fly from tree to tree.for days he wondered in the hills and meadows,and walked along the mountain stream.and sat on the ridge.but no answer to the pain made any sence.he desided he would never get close to anyone again he was treating.and that seemed to help ease his heart alittle,well at lest for that minute anyway.

then he was walking in the north meadow one after noon and had lay down in the grass and watched the sky.he fell asleep and dreamed a lovely dream.he saw this lovely place with grass as green as emerelds, and sky as blue as ever he had seen .the trees were waving and birds were singing and flowers covered the ground.he heard a voice in the distance and turned to see missy.she skipped over to him and said.

doctor mic you neednt feel sorry for me.Iam here with Jesus in this lovely place.I came for the time I was there and did what Jesus told me, and now I am home.and now you need to meet Jesus so when you find it time to leave you can come here to.and she smiled and skipped off with him watching her go.and then he woke up.he could feel this warm feeling of love and of joy.

he looked around and saw it had gotten dark.and the wind had picked up and storm clouds were moving in.and off in the distance lighting flashed across the evening sky.he got to his feet and walked in a hurry to get back to the cabin before it rained.

the grass was slippery on the path and once or twice he slipped as he hurryed.the rain came in lightly and he had to whip his eyes now and then to see where he was going.he came around a bend in the woods and nearly fell to his death cause he had taken a wrong turn in the dark.he had just managed to catch hold of the big pine as his foot went off the ridge.he pulled himself up and got his footing and walked on.he was shacken and watched where he was going more carefully after that.

when he came to the path near the cabin he felt safe again.had that pine tree not been there he would have fallen and no one would have found him for days maybe years.this side of the mountain where he was and the path he had been on was on the wilderness side of the mountain.people who got lost on that side of the mountain uselly sayed lost.he said to himself good thing that old pine was there.and a voice said "thank God it was there."but he pertended he didnt hear the voice.

the days were going fast and he would have to go back to town soon and his job.but he didnt feel any better.even the dream as lovely as it had been didnt answer any of his questions nore heal his lonely heart.as he made his supper he thought to himself about his life.about all the things he had learned in school and collage.things that said there was no God.only some fairy tail for weaklings to cling to cause they werent strong enough to handle the real world.he had met christains in collage and they had tryed to tell him why they believed what they did.but he had been polight and walked away saying he was too busy to talk now.and it had worked.he thought they were nice enough people,but he wasnt interested.

a friend of his mom had also tryed to speak to the family but his mom had said she didnt want to talk about it.that had been years ago and the lady had passed away a few years later.he had liked her cause she would always talk to him and give him candy when he came into her store.

as mic eat the burger he fryed.he sat on the chair near the window and watched the lighting.he didnt know why he felt so lost when he had every thing.he thought maybe he should get married.maybe he would feel more fullfilled with a wife.but his friends were married and they felt nearly as lonely as he did but wouldnt addmit it to anyone but him.O they loved their wives and familys but they said some thing was missing and they didnt know what.none of them were believers eather so mic didnt feel bad.but he knew missys family and they were christains and far from being weaklings.he had watched them face this sorrow with strength and hope,even when their little one died.

he couldnt figure how anyone could trust a God who would let their daughter die.he would never understand!!!he finished his meal and washed the dishes.and then he picked up alittle.man he was getting to be a pig.he hadnt really done anything for days but walk and eat and sleep.so the cabin looked like some lazy person lived there.he changed the sheets on the bed and swept the floor and picked up the coffee cups he had left where he layed them.soon all was clean and in its place.and by then it was near midnight.

he crawled into the clean sheets and fell into a deep sleep.he saw himself walking in a high meadow by a spring feed stream.he watched the water rushing down the rock covered stream bed.he sat and watched it for a while .all at once he saw a man looking at him from across the stream.he thought he should know the man.the more he looked at the man the more he could see the love in the mans eyes.and the more uneasy he becamse.he didnt know this man and here he was all alone.why was this man staring at him.then the man spoke.

"mic you need to deside before you leave this mountain".and as soon as he said it he was gone.and the dream faded to a restless sleep,so restless mic woke with sweat running down his face.some one or some thing had chased him into a dark cave.and he had woke up from fear.

he looked at the clock and it was nearly 3;00am.he sat up and desided to go to the bathroom. he came back and got some water.and stood by the window but it was too dark to see anything but the pine branch close to the window.

he lay down and tryed to go to sleep again.and as he did he seen some thing sticking out of his bag.he had forgotten he had put lamb in it before he left the hospital,and completly forgot to take him out.he reached over and pulled the cute little guy out into the light.he could see why missy had loved him so.his face was fuzzy and he had a smile as big and as happy as any one he had seen.his little eyes were blue and he had a ribbon of blue around his neck.a little flower covered the not on the ribbon.and he was soft and cuddly.a little tag said my name is lambkin and I belong to missy and she belongs to Jesus ,dec 2 the day she was born again.missys mother had written it there.

mic looked at the lamb and he felt loss creep into his heart again.he was going to through the lamb when he felt some thing in its back.he turned it over and found a small zipper on his back.he unzipped it and a little book fell out.

mic picked the book off the floor and looked at it.the pictures on the out side were child like but it was a small bible with missys name on it.he opened it up and inside in missys mothers hand was written.missy ann .her frist christmas from mommy and Daddy.then under it a picture of missy as a tiny baby.and under the picture, was written( give to doc mic if some thing happens to me.missy.)signed in a childs hand writing.dated only a few days before her death.

mic cryed tears that ran down his face and dripped on to his bare chest.he just let them fall he lay there for a long time with the bible layed across his chest.then he opened it and saw the words "you must be born again or you can not enter the kingdom of God".

mic didnt know what it ment.so he opened to another page "seek yee frist the kingdom of God and all his rightousness and all these things shell be added unto you".he had all the things he needed so this didnt make sence to him eather.so he truned to another page.

"believe in the name of the Lord Jesus christ, and you shell be saved and your house hold".well this is what he needed.his family wasnt saved none of them believed in anything but money and hard work,and helping others.they were good people, they just werent the God kind of people.

but he knew there was some thing to God.there was some reason why missy was sent to talk to him.and he had loved her ,and he knew she had loved him.cause she had given him the thing she loved most to keep him comforted if some thing happened to her.and as she had said to let him know Jesus loved him and missed him.

mic looked around as if to see if anyone was looking.then he giggled to himself who would be looking no one was here and no one but the wild life knew where he was.he got on his knee,s and prayed,Jesus missy loved you.and I dont even know if your real or not but I know darn well I aint happy.and my life its not all I thought it was cracked up to be.I have every thing but still feel empty.

if you are real can you please show me so I can believe.forgive me for the years I sent running away from you.for not hearing those you sent across my path to tell me about you.please save me Jesus so when I leave I will be able to see missy and thank her for lamb.

mic lay his head on the bed and waited.no load sound of angels singing althow they did in heaven for it says all heaven rejoyces at the salvation of each sinner.no emotion flooded his soul.just a peace he could not explain washed over him like a lovely warm ocean wave.he knew there was a God,and he knew that he knew that he knew he was saved.

he cryed and he thanked God for sending missy,and for all the others who had tryed.he told God how lonely he had been and how he couldnt figure why when he was doing his best it never seemed good enough no matter how hard he tryed.there was always some thing missing.he lay talking to God.and woke still on the floor with his head on the bed and sitting on the floor.

he streched and looked around.every thing looked new,and he felt bran new.he got up and took a shower and eat breakfast.and took his coffee to the screen porch.the birds were singing and the colored leaves were falling in a shower of sun light.as he sat there he wanted to share his new found love to mary.he would call her when he got home.he loved mary in a way he had never loved another woman.but he didnt understand why.maybe he would one day.

he looked up from his thoughts of only a few weeks before and saw mary coming down the street.big smile on her face.as she linked her arm through his, she said have I got something to share with you.and he said "me to..."

All rights reserved to the auther and blog owner.copy/ right .dec 5th 2007.no part of this can be used or printed.Leann viewfromtheeaglesnest..