Glory rays

My grandson TJ calls these (Glory Rays).I think its a good name.
some people call them sun dogs.
but I think glory rays fit them best.
1 Corinthians 15;41.The sun has one kind of glory while the moon and stars have another kind.
And the stars differ from each other in their beauty and brightness.


God bless everyone,have a great weekend.

Flooting on the spring time air.

the rains came, hurryed rushing along as if late for some appointment some place else.as fast as it came it was gone.













the rainbow came as a sign the storm was past.the grass started to green up.and the beauty of the spring again refreshed my winter chilled spirit.the sun,s warmth melted the touch of the winters icey fingers off my soul.and gave me the hope for the new season ahead.and for a better.


I love the fact God put a sign in the sky that he would never destroy the earth again with a flood.he had made it in the sky to tell noah and his family, that their new life had begon .so they could walk out knowing that it was a new start.

I hate when others use this sign for anything other then what God intended.its a sign of blessings being restored to people who were faithful to do as God told them.

a rainbow is a sign to me that God keeps his word.there has not been another whole world flood.and that is what this sign means.

To me its a sign of hope.and the treasure at the end of it is Jesus,not a make believe pot of gold.or for a sign of sin but the end of it.


Today as I was thinking about what to write.I took a look at my comments and read some that were on here the other day.a dear friend who I call (blue eyes )gave me a Idia.( its the little things,blog)
she was talking about flooting down a river in the nude ("HOLD ON HOLD ON SHE WAS ONLY THINKING ABOUT IT!!!!SO DONT GO RUNING OVER THEiR JUST YET").now she could get away with it she is pretty and shapely."me" Id scare the crap out of the fish ,wild life ,and any people along the way.and all those save the animals people would be trying to drag the whale back out into salt water.
but that is another story.

I said all that to say this.I remember a day I went down to the creek .it was when I was about 7 or 8.it was one of those days a kid cant wait to get outside and find some thing wonderful to do.the sky was so blue you could just lay down in the hay and watch the clouds roll by.there were fuffy little jolly clouds dancing across the sky.the birds were busy making nests in the maple tree by the creek road.the dogs were hunting for some thing in the hey field south of the house.granny was hanging up clothes and mom was washing them in the ringer washer on the north side of the house near the hack berry tree.

she had the two rinse tubbs full of cold water. and had put the blueing in it to make the sheets come out so white you would think they were new.my Dad was in his shop welding some broken farm parts for some one who brought them to his back smith shop.everyone was busy with the every dayness of farm life,and living.

Me I was itching for addventure.I asked mom if I could walk down by the creek?she said you better wait till granny can walk with you.I said Moooooom you know I will stay away from the water.I just need to go for a walk and see what I can see.she ran down the rules.
1.dont go near the water.(that ment dont get so close you can fall in and drown.)

2.stay away from animals that ment, dont let a stunks spray, you I already have too many clothes to wash!!!. and dont get hurt by badgers,and dont let a bears eat you.

3.stay away from the water!!!!(that ment dont get any bright Idias of going in for a swim!!!to cool off.)

4.come back when granny calls for you.(OOOOO mom you know she will call the minute I get over by the crabapple tree by the bee seller ,that was not even out of the yard!!!)

so I said please dont tell her tell I have to come home please!!!!she said ok but you be careful!!yes mom .


I took off on a dead run.down the drive way to the creek lane as fast as I could so granny didnt see me.going to the creek.
she was hanging clothes and almost saw me as I ran past the house.but I flew by her like the wind.by the time she looked to see what went past I was on the other side of the old shop,and well on my way to an addventure.

I loved the creek road.it was just plain dirt.with little tufts of green grass growing up here and there in the middle where the tracktor tires or car tires didnt touch.there were big ruts in it from when the rainy times made it so muddy Dad would have one heck of a time getting to the fields.those ruts held rain and I was a avide puddle jumper.so Id spend a good part of a day with my feet in the puddles.it was heaven.

as I walked along the dust flew up and made little clouds.as I got close I could see and smell, the plum tree was in bloom .and I could hardly wait tell granny made wild plum jelly.yummmmmmy!!!and the choke chreey bushs were in bloom to.the hey was coming up and was filling in nicely after the winter.things were green and life was good.

the road was about half a mile long so it took me a while to reach the creek, its self.I aways slowed down and was as quiet as a Indain hunting.Id walk ever so slow and quiet so the wild life didnt know I was there.Id check the skunk den at the base of the old snarly oak tree on the hill,to be sure mommy skunk wasnt sunning her self.Id walk past fast so she couldnt surprise me and spray me.

but as I pasted by it didnt look like she was there this spring.there were no tracks in the sand at the door.so I breath alittle easyer.

I was only a short way from the creek now,it was only about 20 feet to my left down a small bank.the old cat tail rushs from last fall ,were blocking my view of it.I would go to the little road Dad put in so we could go across the swampy area to pine Island.

I look down by the old cabin foundtion my great granpa had lived in when he frist moved here.there was a dark thing I always thought was a bear.but it was a blowen over alder tree,and its roots were still covered with the black dirt from the swamp.so it had looked like a bear once when I had come along after a storm.believe me my heart stopped and I stopped dead in my trakes tell I saw what it was that day.but every time after Id still check it to be sure.and the same feeling would grip my tummy.

there was a great blue heron in the water at the creek shore.he didnt see me cause I was still down wind and behind the rushs.I could see him but he didnt see me. I stood still and watched him walk along looking in the water for his lunch.as I came closer I slowed down again and watched him some more.I love the way they walk.they pick their long legs up out of the water so they dont cause waves and scare the fish away.they put them selves between the sun and their food,so they look like a old cloud flooting over.that way the fish dont know they are about to get picked out of the water.its awesome how God made them.

soon I deside I better get my self going.he heard me before he seen me and flew up and over me and was gone off into the swamp.a blue jay heard the comoshion and gave his sentinal cry,to let everyone know there was a intruder in their home.I love jays but they make me mad.I miss out on the eliment of surrpise then.he flew off and I thought good!!!big mouth!!!

I walked along the trail out to the little diving dock.I was going to walk out to the meadow beyond but the spring flood had washed out some of the little road.Dad would not be happy about that.it would take him some time to fix before he could go over there.

I sat down on the bank away from the water a few feet. so I wouldnt get in dutch with mom when she asked how close I was to the water."geesh," I love the water didnt she know how hard it was for a kid on a warm day to keep her feet out of the water?no all she cared about was that I didnt fall in and drown before I could get out.
I never did figure how one could drown in about 6 inches of water.but then you know mom,s!!!the creek its self was deep over by the swimming hole,there it was about 10 feet deep in the very middle.but I never went there alone.

I layed back on the grass and looked up at the clouds.they were just flooting along ever so slowly not in any hurry.a barn swallow drated by and was gone.most likely dipping mud form the creek bank to build his nest.the site of him in flight made me wish I could fly.

as I lay there I heard a dove in the distance calling for her mate,soon off in the swamp I heard him call back.I cupped my hands and made the call .soon one flew over to see what strange new dove called.I lay still so it didnt know what I was.it sat and looked around and soon left when it didnt hear the call again.

I was enjoying my self so much.a wood picker was pecking on a tree off in the woods.a dargon fly flew past my head and scared me.a fat bumble bee came and landed by the water to get a drink.poor guy looked tired from his flight.he stood there a second or so as if getting strangth to go on.soon he lifted off and was gone.and acorn ,left over from last fall hit the ground behind me making a thod sound.

I was so peaceful I was almost ready to fall asleep.only a few seconds more and Id have been fast asleep.but the curly hair, fast footed, shrill ,addventure stopping granny called off in the distance.I could hear the high pitch eeeeeeeeeeeeeee at the end of my name.yap it was time to go home.I reluctantly got to my feet and headed home to the corous of the curly hair in the distance.I picked up my pace as the sound got more intence.soon I seen her looking down the road.I waved and she waved and the eeeeeeeeee stopped.

many times, over the years that eeeeeeeee would call me home.at those times Id hate the sound cause I knew it was the end of some great addvernture.but as I got older and the years passed by, and that wonderful call was heard no more .Id give anything to hear that eeeeeeeee just once more and run to that set of open arms .and hear I love you,I was worryed about you.
OOOOOOO I miss those good old days of wonder, and beauty,and voices and faces I will not see till I go home.

treasure the voices,the faces,the addventures you have.cause time passes and things change and you can never go home again.but only in your mind.



written by PLS.all rights reserved.

spring dreams

the rain came the flowers will soon bloom.
spring is finely here.the grass is green.
the song birds are singing again.
the lilac and cherry tree,s will soon be full of wonderful crowns of sweet perfume.

peaceful river side.

Two posts today. (read the bottom one under this one first.the bad news first then the good.)

Find your self a safe peaceful place to set.and let the Lord show you the beauty of his
world,he will send you things to bless you.He sends me eagles ,ducks,geese,fish that wave,birds that sing,and O so many wonerful and beauiful things.He sits there with me.and watchs my smile.he longs to please me, cause after all I am his child .he is the best Dad a girl could want.

(Psalm 23.the Lord is my belove shepherd,he gives me every thing I need.
he lets me rest in the meadow, he leads me by the still water where I may drink in the beauty all around me,and be refreshed.

he gives me stength for the journey,and hope for the future.even if I have to walk through the valley of the shadow of death ,Iwill not fear for it is but a shadow and can hurt me no more.

you guide me and are close beside me all the way.you provide delicious food for me in the presence of my enemies.you welcome me as your guest at your own table and your blessings to me over flow.
Your goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life and when I leave here I shall be with you forever in your home.

me and the sweet girl who cleaned my teeth.

I will write today about a nice young girl who helped me get over being scared of dentists.
she took very good care of me.and was very gental.I enjoyed talking to her.
we talked about family and interests.she lives about a hour from me.
and is blessed to live near the water.
she may call me later and do some more work for me.I will have to see.
pray for her cause she has her finals coming up for school she was alittle worryed.its 8 long hours of test.so please keep her in your prayers.her name is ashley.

THANK GOD FOR GOOD DAYS OR iD NOT BE ABLE TO MAKE IT!!!!



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NOW FOR THE CRAPY PART OF THE DAY!!!

keep me and my family in your prayers to.we got more bad news again today!!!
its as if we are on the devils hit list.we must be doing something right to be bugged so much.they say if you aint doing nothing for the Lord he {DEVIL} leaves you pretty much alone.
so we most be hitting a spot in his armer to get him all tee,d off.

well I believe the Lord has the last word so we will walk out of this with a new testimony.
like they say "you have to have a test to have a mony"!
so I will tell you how the Lord gets us out of this stinking mess.and fill you in about the mess then.I just need a vacation from crap.
I have to get the bumper sticker I told you about."some times I deal with so much crap,I feel like a farmer".
I think I will take a break for a while.

lets just say if you have family you havent heard from in over 20 years.make darn sure you know if you want to see them or not before you look them up.you may find you were blessed they were gone.
when someone passes away the rats crawl out of the wood work.and you find out who you can trust and who you cant.the people in your family may not be interested in your best interests.
I found that I have been blessed to be spared a big load of junk.but now its the saying "little rat crawl back under the rock you crawled out from under and leave me alone.

just cause you came from the same family doesnt mean you have the same heart or feelings.it just says you came from the same family.but then so did cain and able!!!and you know how that turned out.

I long for a place with no nuts running around.and where I can live my life without stupid people who only care about themselves.
boy you live and learn.I always said that with all the problems we have had with some of the long sleeve family members of my moms family.that when she passed, it would be the last time Id deal with them out of respect for mom.well I was right.as soon as all of this is over ,and mom,s wishes are carryed out it will be the last time Ill have anything to do with them.

life is hard enough with out having to deal with waco,s and fruit cakes.and believe me we have some real waco banana,s on her side.yicks I need a vacation!!!! good Lord what did I do to end up with these people to have to deal with?

Ill tell you one thing Lord "if your going to save them ,at lest put them on the far side of heaven on the hotter side so I dont have to ever see them."

why is it when money is conserned do the rats show up?they will get their dumb money!!!my mom put it down so they would.but NOOOO they have to gum up the works and cause problems.we could have had this all worked out already and every thing ready to hand out the cash and they have to contest the one handing out the cash.Good Lord give me mercy and grace.cause I need it!!!

LORD I NEED A WAY TO GET AWAY FOR A WHILE!!!I NEED ALSO TO BE SAVED FROM DEALING WITH WACO BANANAS AS WELL.now I wish I were a only child!!!what happened to that sweet little baby boy who was my brother?I know he doesnt believe in you Jesus.so thats part of it.but even evil people have love for their family.this part of the family has been a heart break for us for a long time.no matter what you do you cant please them or get along with them.what are we suppose to do?

sorry to share this with you but if I dont vent Ill blow up!!!!pray for us we need it.I wish I were able to just not have to deal with any of this part of the family.they cause so much stress and problems I can hardly see how they can live themselves.

I will say it again.
"thank God when I fell off the nut tree ,I was able to roll a long way away, till the Lord was able to put me on his tree!!!
some day Ill look back and maybe think this was funny.but today its far from funny.boy I need a break !!!!!


glad Iwas able to have a breath of fresh air for the weekend before the bomb hit today!

HAVE A GREAT WEEK.thanks for reading.I said Id tell you the truth here so I did.and not cover over and I will.so this is the mess here .

here is the picture I promised.

{Be sure you go to the golden eagle entry frist to read after this one.then the story will fit together.}
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
now I know its all a-- back wards.sorry.I just was writing and didnt think .so it will have to be
the way it is.
guess sometimes I do things a-- back wards.but Id rather do things a-- back wards ,then to be a a--.

this is my best eagle picture to date.its the one I will hang in my home one day.

say can anyone of my blog friends give me a good name for the pictrue if so Ill put your name on the picture.
he is looking to the south,at the forest his nest is in.he is letting me take this picture.Iam sitting in the car right under him on the road.he sat there and let hubby inch up close so I could take this picture.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
well this is a BIG POST!!!! and I can hear my grandson now."NANA what the heck????you know I hate to read!!!!do you have to make them sooooo long?

to that I say" YEEEEEEEEEES!!!!!! how can you tell a story in two words and make it interesting?
so any way its sunday and we are under the gun.a storm is on its way.no not one like I was talking about the other day.a good old fastioned wind whistling barn shaking hail making gully washer.they say we could get some bad wind,and so it dont sound good.pray for us.we need rain but no bad stuff.Ill recieve the rain but the bad stuff can fly right on by!!!

before I desided to do my blog I watched a movie I love.its a very touching one.and I think anyone man or woman would love it.there are some very good things to learn in it.kids would love it to.

its about a old guy who rides his john deer mower from Iowa to wisconsin.he was on the road over 5 weeks or more.he was going to see his brother who he hadnt talked to or seen for over 10 years.the brother had had a stroke and the guy wanted to make things right before they both died.its a good movie.its call "STRIGHT STORY".and the time spent watching it will bless you to the core.and make you see what great love will do to right a wrong .its one of the movies I will watch over and over again.


WELL HAVE A GREAT WEEK AND THE REST OF A WONDERFUL SUNDAY.REMEMBER YOUR LOVED BY THE LORD AND ME!

THANKS FOR READING AND HOPE IT WASNT BORING>WHAT INTESTS ME MAY NOT INTREST YOU.IF SO IAM SORRY.

GOD BLESS YOU.

read the golden eagle entry frist then it will fit together.

As I sat there thinking about how long ago those graves were placed there .I felt how many years of people
there have been sence Jesus was here. I finished a entry in my journal and looked
up just in time to see these two eagles fly over.if I hadnt finished at the right time ,Id
have missed them and never even knew they flew by.the Lord is so good.it has happened like that all my life.He helps me be in the right place at the right time.to enjoy what he placed there for me.{your so good Lord.}
they flew off to the north and where gone.I closed the jounal and just sat and listoned to the sounds and enjoyed the view.

the hounds were still on the trail.they would only stop now and then when they lost the sent.then when they picked it up again they were off on their chase again.the road down in the valley was being visited by weekend visiters.I was glad I had come to the ridge instead of the river road.cause even where I was I could tell the road was wet!!! and a four wheel was needed.and my white van would have been muddy brown if I had taken that road.

some people drove down and right back out.why come if your only going to drive through?it aways makes me wonder how much they miss by never staying in one place long.I think of all the blessings I saw just the time I was here.its some thing new every time.people miss so much by always being in a all fired hurry!!!the peace one can recieve if one only slowed down enough to be able to be reached.
this day was a blessing to me.and I thanked the Lord for it.and for the things he brought my way.I drove home slowly as to be sure I didnt miss anything.I hope you enjoyed my saturday drive.if you did tell me and Ill share more of my addventures with you.

cemetry ridge.

Every thing is still gray and lifeless.the ground is ready for planting and all of nature
waits for the rain to bring the green shoots to life.I put this picture cause its just how it looks.
I have other better ones with bright bittersweet and fall colors but this picture shows what I saw.

the farmer had cut up some wood and it was laying along the forsets edge.if you push on the picture you will see it clearer.the bittersweet wasnt as lovely and plump as it was in the fall.but the view was still lovely.

I shut off the van and sat there with the wind blowing lightly in the window.every so often the breeze would tug at the lose hairs by my cheek.I could hear a chic a bee singing off in the jack pines next to me.I could hear two hounds off some place in the valley hot on the trail of some varmet.their howls drifted on the wind down the valley.the smell of spring was in the air.fresh turned earth,mixed with rain from the last rain storm.I felt at home.

I closed my eyes and wondered if in deed some day I may live out this way?I lived about 8 or 9 miles straight north of here when I was a kid.so this was home to me.I had traveled this country all most all my life.I came here every chance I got.but only the Lord knows the place he has for me.

I picked up my bible and read psalm 34{its one the Lord gave me to stand on long ago.I like it best in the living bible}.
and wrote in my journal I keep in the van for days like this.I read some of the entrys and I felt bad cause the entrys pretty much spoke what had happened .
met my man, loved him and lost him all in the span of a few pages.it had been mouths all condenced in a juornal of only a few pages.
I wrote down the beauty of the day and the fact "I was not alone.I had Jesus and he was the best husband I ever had."and the words helped me to let the past go.

I wonder how people can just walk away from someone and not even call to see how they were doing for 6 months.but it just shows that the match wasnt made in heaven.
its been along time now sence we talked.I checked to see how he was.he had called one night about three weeks ago cause he was having problems.I prayed with him.but sence I called to check I have heard nothing.it only shows he cares little for me ,only himself.I made the right choice!!Iam better off.

the cemetry behind me is very old.its stones are from the 18oos.there is some you cant even read they are weathered so much.there are a few newer ones but I dont think cemetry is in use any more.
some one came along time ago and cleared years of dead grass and things away.and sat up stones that were falling down.
and now its cared for.there is a babys stone with a teddybear on it.
the bear is old and weathered and it sits to remind one that someone lost this child years ago and they were loved.the family is years gone now and the child many years buryed in this place.but still one knows they were loved.and I hope they are all together on that other shore.smiling faces joyfull and happy together again.

a golden eagle on a lovely spring day

Saturday was another wonderful mild spring day.I just couldnt set insided and miss it.
I got my body up and dressed.headed out to the van and took a drive out of town.I just
let the Lord lead me.I drove along headed down to the river north of my place.and sat for
a while and enjoyed the song birds and the boats on the water.some guy was trying out some ones boat.

He was very surprised to see how fast it could go.in fact he swore to get his point a cross.I didnt like the way he used the name he used to say it. I would have said man Lord this baby moves.but some people like to use His name as dirt,instead of giving it glory.but they dont know any better.or maybe the do and dont care.but one day when they need him and he dont pay attention .cause he has heard them use his name in vain so much.then maybe they will learn.

I sat for a while longer and then headed west.I went out on a old country road I had not been on for a while.hubby and I had driven down it once a while back cause I wanted him to see the roads I use to travel with my motor cycel.

as I drove along I was watching for things to share with you on the blog.as I came up over a small hill and was coming to another.I seen three bumps on the ridge.now I know what it ment "Eagle" surounded by crows.and I drove by and turned around to be at a better angel for pictures.as I drove close he flew and I had to take one in flight.he was big and I just was so blessed that the Lord had brought me down this road and showed me this site.the bird was healthy looking and made it through winter fine.the crows were healthy looking to.the Lord had been good to them.soon he flew out of site and I turned around and headed on my way.

I was close to a place hubby and I use to go alot and see eagles.I took my best picture of one there.I will put it on the top of this post when I finish so you can enjoy it again.I passed the little country churchs, and drove along the river passed the servaster pool road and down by the farm where the eagles nest is way out in their woods.the nest is still in use cause its bigger then last year so I know they built it up more last year.or they could be adding to it now.

the farmer and his wife were in the yard talking,as I drove by.I didnt see the eagles anywhere.so I drove slowly by the oak tree I love.its a awesome tree.I snaped one more piture of it.some day Ill hang the picture in my home.why put up art work if it isnt yours?I use to hide my stuff away and put up artists I liked.well why not put up some of my own?

I desided the river road would be too wet this time of year so I optted for the ridge road instead.I went up snake hill and along the dump road till I came to the cemetry road that runs past the nice Log home hubby and I found one day just by chance.its back in out of site behind where the dump use to be.over looking the river on a ridge.its a cool place to have a log home.but the dump is only about 100 yards form them.one wonders what their water is like?wonder if anyone told them that its there?

I pulled into the cemetry and parked along the ridge close to the edge to be able to look down in the valley to the south east.Ill go put the picture of the view so you can share it.

A picture of Anna,s garden.

It was so nice today I couldnt sit in the house one more minute.I got dressed and headed for a ride.
I cashed my check,and stopped to get gas.and then picked up two frys and cheese bugers
and heaed to Ann,s.she didnt know I was coming.she was waiting for a call from the Laywer
we have,who Iam sorry to say aint the fastest person on the planet.she is as slow as
oil in winter!!!!
I drove along slow and just enjoyed the day.there werent any eagles to be seen.or much of any thing to really catch my eye.just one of those lovely spring days your glad your alive.
I thought about the junk going on and the things that have happened.and I just enjoyed the drive.If I couldnt get out now and then Id go buggy.the driving has always calmed me and helped me think.I have found alot of answers to problems on long drives with the Lords help.
there were horses in the fields here and there.they were enjoying the weather to.the cows were suning themselves on the hills by Anna,s.a little calf was laying near his mom
sound asleep.his mom watched him sleep as she lay suning her self.
as I came to Anna,s I seen she had her shades pulled.she always has them open to let the sun in.when I got in the house she said she felt low because of the junk going on.

we talked about some of the junk.and just let it roll off our backs.its nice to have someone who will liston even if you just need to talk.

we eat lunch and and she hung some clothes on the line.I love the smell of fresh washed clothes off the line.I didnt stay long cause she had to go pick up one of the boys from school.TJ was going to stay with a friend,and Jake needed a ride home.we hugged before I left .and she headed to hang a few more things out.

I drove home slow.I felt better just talking to her.she is a good kid.she trys real hard to be there for everyone.and she has alot on her shoulders.the Lord helps her cause she is strong and trusts him.

she has helped me alot in the years.taken the loud off my shoulders when I needed her.took wonderful care of me when I was sick with cancer.and took me into her home.my son in law picked up my recliner and put it in their livingroom.and they gave up their room for the time I was there.they will never know just how much it ment to me.if I would have had to go in a nurcing home Id never have made it.
I got to know my grandsons better while there.

early in the moring Id watch cartoons with the oldest boy.we would be real quiet cause everyone else would be asleep.Id sit in the recliner and watch the birds in Anna,s feeders.and it blessed me so.and me and TJ would talk.he is a smart young man.he was younger then and I could see how smart he was growing up to be.he has a good head on his shoulders.{I love both boys very much}
I remember the day I knew it was time to go home.I felt inside that I would be able to do for myself.so I packed and was getting ready to leave.when TJ said NaNa dont go who will I watch TV with in the morning?he looked like he would cry.poor little guy.

Jake would give me shots about 5 times a day.he seen the nurce who would come to give me shots.so she left him just the shot with out the needle.I said boy Jake NaNa is sure glad I dont have you as my doc,Id be a pin cushon!!!he,d smile and give me another shot and say.this will help you get better NaNa.and you know he was right.all his care did get me better.Anna and Id hide the fact we would giggle over things he would do.sweet little guy.he would have a snack and get one and bring it to me.those were good days.

I dont remember all the bad stuff from that time cause I have all the good memories to remember.the day all of them came to my apartment to see me after I went home.Lucy,Em,and new born only 3 months old sar bear.TJ,Jake Anna.I will put the picture on my blog.so you can see that day.it was the day the devil got kicked in the face.he thought he was going to kill me off with cancer.
and the Lord healed me and I had the picture to show it.
{I told the old boy{devil} months before that day"that he messed with the wrong fat chic!!!cause I was going to get better and I was going to tell everyone I could about how Jesus healed me of cancer.and if he messed with me again Id do the same."}so you see Iam ture to my word.THE CREEP MESSED WITH THE WRONG FAT CHIC!!!

the drive home made me think of a few things I needed to get at the store.and it was way too nice to be inside.so I headed over to the dollor store first.picked up some shampoo,tea something or other from vo five.a back scratcher {as you know mine moved back home to his mother.}this one dont work as good but causes alot less stress if you get my drift? some shower hats,to keep my bean dry in the shower.some stickers for my journals.some fabric spray so my sinking chairs smell good.and some other stuff.
I had heard about this store from a friend who said check it out they have some good stuff.she was right they did.

I left there and desided to head to the park for a while.didnt feel yet as if I wanted to go home.so I drove down to my spot and parked.I couldnt go down to the places where hubby and I use to go.it was hard at frist.I made a big mistake by taking him to all my spots.cause when he left I had no place to go where a memorie wasnt.but I have sence taken them all back.and Iam ok.the memories are not so painful any more.and thats ok.and I dont feel bad about sharing things with him.some day he will understand what he gave up.and maybe he will know what it did to me.I dont think he understands how people feel.he is to busy thinking about him self to understand that.he is a nice kid and he has some nice things about him.but he has a long way to grow up yet.I gave him all of me and put my all into this relationship.but it didnt matter.it just wasnt ment to be.so its best it ended as it did.

I sat by the muskrat den and watched the water.didnt see the muskrat.but two ducks came along and I took their picture.they were fat and healthy looking.the male was ahead and showing the female where to go by the ice.she followed along going the same places he did.
she seemed to trust him.hope she picked a better mate then I did.I use to see two ducks flying and Id feel sad cause I didnt have someone.but I have to remember I have Jesus.he is always in the seat next to me.

I layed my head back on the head rest and listoned to the birds singing in the tree,s near me.the air coming through the open window smelled fresh from the rain we had the night before.I could smell the pines next to me.and I felt at peace as I sat there.I was almost ready to fall asleep I was so relaxed.but figured I better get home and get some thing done.
the day had washed away the junk of the passed months.and the it was far from my mind.I left the park feeling that I was glad I had the Lord and Anna to talk to.

as I sat at home this evening the sun was going down in the west.it was another beautiful sunset.the clouds were pinks and purples and the sun was one big orange ball on the horison.I wondered over the years how many of those lovely ones I took pictures of?and how many I was too busy to even see.
{it was a good day Lord.it was a refresher for me.thanks Lord.}

THANKS EVERYONE FOR READING.HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND AND GOD BLESS YOU.

the storm clouds move in.

Last night the storm clouds moved in,and the ligthing flashed across the sky.I could smell the rain coming before it ever hit the ground.the thunder rolled in the distance and the flicker of lighting showed here and there in the western sky.
I lay there in my bed and listened to the rain drops on the window,and the sound of the night time storm.

I love spring time thunderstorms.I have ever sence I was a kid.I use to sit in my room close to the window and watch the storm move by.I love to see the rain drops hit the glass.they make shapes and run down the glass in cool ways.
the days I could get to the barn before it rained were so wonderful.Id climb to the hay loft and lay on the hay and watch it storm through the big hay mow door.some times Id fall asleep just hearing the rain drops on the roof.

but the day I took this picture I could feel a storm coming and I knew it wasnt a good old spring time harmless storm.it was one that would change things forever for my family.
I didnt want to think about it cause there was already so much we had to get over. but the storm was coming anyway.
there was nothing I could do.

I sat there hoping that some how I was wrong and that the knowing I had inside was wrong.but it wasnt!the Lord had always warned me long before the storms of life were even able to be seen in the horizon.He warned me to pray.and how I had prayed.but the storm kept coming and soon the damage was done.

this storm wasnt the kind you can clean up after and go on as if nothing had happened.it was the kind that sweeps every thing off its foundation and leaves you with nothing to hang onto.it rips apart every thing you are a costom to and leaves you looking in vain for some since of truth.but you cant find any.you cant believe it happened or even how it happened you just know it did.

you look for help to go on but it seems there isnt any.you look for answers and none come.you ache for those who were hurt by the storm but know there isnt any way to fix it.you look for some thing to save from the storm.but you have nothing,your starting out fresh.ties that were once unable to break now mean nothing.and people you lived with your whole life are strangers and so diffrent you dont know them.once you could trust them now you cant even look at them cause the site of them brings nothing but pain!!

the storm has cleared a path of destruction.and some of the ones dont even see it.you wonder how blind they can be?you see it clearly but they see only what they see and care little for what the storm destoryed.

you long for what is gone but its gone and you cant go back.and the future looks empty and unreal.you go on hoping each new day will be better.then all at once another storm comes and knocks you down more.and you wonder what is going on.you know you love God and you have done all you know to do.but the storms keep coming.your sooo tired you know if God doesnt do something you will no longer be able to go on.you turn to him and confess you cant take anymore.

He comes to you and tells you he hasnt left you.that he didnt send the storms !!they came from a world that is as messed up as the people who do not follow him,or care what he says or wants for them.they care only for themselves and care little about what they do. as long as they get what they want when they want it.storms come for all kinds of reasons.but some come because of selfishness,and lack of respect for others.

but one can only do what they can do and hope that some how some way even if your dumped on.you can still keep on keeping on in the face of evil.it dont pay to think sinners have it better then we do.they may look like life is better for them.but its decptive because there is a day of judgement.

I went through the storms and it wasnt easy.I thought many times about just folding and leaving.but I know that is not the answer.I know that things built on lies and decption and evil,will not stand,it will fall and raise no more.and the truth will come out.and those who did their best will have the victory.and the storms will come and the winds may blow but the ones who followed God will come out and shine.

I know that when the wind picks up and the storm clouds move in.I know the storm can only last so long.and if I hold onto Jesus and not take my eyes off him.I can walk on water.I know that if I do the best I can and keep on keeping on Ill make it.I know he loves me.and he didnt intend for me to be destoryed by the storm.he intended me to stand in the shelter of his wings and watch the storm move by.and when the clouds are gone and the sun comes out Ill be still standing.and I will have the voitory cause I trusted him.

I still love spring time thunderstorms.they are what bring the flowers.they water the tree,s and make them wake from their long winter sleep.if we never had storms we wouldnt have flowers or tree,s.we would live in a dry life less land.I believe tears wash away the lie,s of this old world and refesh us to be able to see the truth.

but if we refuse to see the truth even when God shows us.then we deserve to get what we get.I lived in relationships that werent good for me.I knew they werent good for me.but I didnt want to be alone.but when I could stand it no more then I made a change.life is too short to live with someone who dont have your best interests at heart.or isnt able to be there when you need them.if you need to handle things alone all the time.then why not be alone?you are anyway.

I learned that if I have Jesus he is all I really need.if I put my trust in people I will always be disapionted,cause they are human and not perfect.but if I put my trust in Jesus I will never be disapionted or let down,and he will never leave me alone.

He is always there when I call.he is never tired,never says Iam too busy.never crumbles when the bottom falls out of things. He steps in when I cant go on alone.he is my strength when I have none.He loves me just as Iam.he came to find me when I was lost.I love him more and more every day.

some say He isnt real,some say all manor of lies about him.but they dont even know him!!!I know him cause I have some thing they dont.I have a history with him.I know him cause I spend time with him.I talk to him.I want to know what he has to say.I need to know what he has to say.

Heck I couldnt go on without him.I wouldnt know what way to go.the foot prints I follow are the ones who lead to home.like the song says "I know Iam on the right path cause I just pasted the cross."

does this world or its trash mean anything to me?no!!!!what does it have that will last?nothing!!and I dont mean the earth.yes I love the earth cause my Daddy created it to bless me.and as a place for me to live.but the world sestom is a devil run devil planned mess.
it doesnt lead you to God ,it leads you away from him.no this old world means nothing to me.

All I have is safe where my heart is.where moth and rust or thief cant break in and steal.{HEAVEN}where my Father holds all that is valuable to me for safe keeping.

I feel this tug on my heart more and more these last few years.the feeling of being more and more home sick for a place I have never been before.a place where tears will never fall.where loved ones will never leave.where love never dies or grows cold.where you can live forever and not have to move.where your home was built by loveing hands.and where the one who bilt it for you stands by his promises.and there are no taxes,no pain,no fear,no killing,no lies,no unfaithfulness,no saddness,sorrow,sickness,lose.

no this world holds nothing for me.I could leave now and not look back.O I love my family.but they can make it alone.I gave them all I know to make it.I gave them all I have to give I gave them Jesus in me.

One day Ill hear my name called,and Ill leave here.it maybe today or a year from now.or it may be years before I leave.but the thing I want to be remembered for is that "in season or out I said the name Jesus to all."if you only got to know me then I failed.but if in our time together you met Jesus then my time here was spent well.

I have met someone who is the love of my life.he is far better then silver or gold.he is the one who holds my heart in the palm of his hand.he has writen my name on his hand.he numbered the hairs of my head.he loves me like no other ever could.he came and promised he would die for me if need be, and he did.he went to make a place for me so where he is I can be also.he will never leave me or forsake me.he lives in my heart as I live in his.He is all I need.his name is sweet and runs across my lips like smooth silk.his love saved me and held me when no one else did.he is more real to me then my own face.he is more real to me then anything this old world has to offer.because I know he is real.

man can rant and rave and say he isnt real.but they dont know what I do.and they could take my life but they cant take my soul!!!and the real me is my soul.and its safe in my Jesus hands.

so let the storm clouds roll,I will stand in the shelter of his wings.and when the sun comes out Ill still be standing.

I READ THE END OF THE BOOK.WE WIN!!!THE VICTORY BELONGS TO THE CHILDREN OF GOD.

THANKS FOR READING AND HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND.GOD BLESS YOU ALL.

the view Id like out my window.

pertend this is the view from my log home.

Come into to my dream and share it.this will be a trip into my desire for a home I can call my own.a place where I know I will not have to move from.a place where my kids can come home to.where my grandkids can come and stay for time without feeling cramped.this is my life long dream.come and share it with me.


Be happy with the Lord,and he will give you the desires of your heart.
Psalm 37;4.

You are my Lord,without you,I have nothing good.
Psalm 16;2.

I know the plans I have for you,declares the Lord,they are plans for peace and not disaster,plans to give you a future filled with hope.
Jeremiah 29;11.

Be strong,all who wait with hope for the Lord,and let your heart be courageous. Psalm 31;24.
God bless and have a great week.

SPRING HAS COME TO THE MIDWEST.AND I M GLAD.

meadow valley homes.

When hubby and I were still together we took a trip to his mom,s for the weekend.as we drove along we came across a beautiful large log home by a big man made pond.we stopped to check it out.the place was awesome.I could have moved in and been in heaven.the way they had it layed out was just right.

As you walked in there was a stairway to your left that went upstairs.and a bedroom or office space to your right.
then you went into a great room and it was sooo cool.the kitchen was on the right and the livingroom and fireplace on your left.and there were big windows floor to roof.
I was just awed by it.there were two good sided bedrooms off the left side of the living room.and one of three bathrooms.
off the right of the kitchen was the master bedroom,and master bathroom.O what a place.the bedroom was soooo cool.it had patio doors,that went out on to the big deck.a fire place and big windows to see the pond.
the bathroom was big and had nice lay out.

my heart said Lord this is the kind of log home I would like.{but I know its way over my head so if its one like I will have then its all up to you to work it out.}

with the three bedrooms down stairs it would have been just right for me and the family.but this place had three bedrooms up stairs to. you walked up the stairs and to your left at the top were two good sized bedrooms.and small bathroom,then to the right a open loft like and sitting room,and another bedroom.or office.it was sooo neat.

it was so guiet in the home.there was cars going by out side but you couldnt hear them.and it was a very hot day and it was very cool in side and there was no air on.but it was just right inside.I was very empressed.the fans above us helped to move the air around and worked well.

we went down stairs and looked at it all again and we both liked it alot.and desided this floor plan was one we would pick.maybe not as many bedrooms.but room for them if we needed them.but I still think about how wonderful that lovely place was.

one day Ill have a log home.and it will be a treasure to me.as you know I been sharing with you my life long dream to have one.as far back as I can remember I have longd to live in one.my stepfather did to.he never got his dream.but Lord willing I will.

well hope you enjoyed the log home trip.if I had one Id put in it the same things they have here in these pictures.

I just love the looks of this home.the fire place and the way its made.

dont you just love the look of logs?

For we walk by faith,not by sight.

read first the one post after the one below.I lined it up wrong.sorry!! O well it hasnt been my month! God bless you all.have a great week.and again I say {think spring}

I sat in the car and waited tell he was ready to come up the bank.I could see it may be alittle hard to come up.the snow was pretty thick and the bank pretty steep.but after alittle bit of grabbing trees he made it.we headed off to get something to eat.

we drove down to one more place I knew of.its along the river on the other side.its where hubby and I seen all the eagles.but there werent any there.
we headed back to town and over to calvers.I ordered us two big jombo butter burgers and frys.I hadnt eatten anything all day and figured I would be full and so would he.

O ya we were full alright.we didnt even get the rootbeer floot I was going to make us.both of us suffered with full tummy cinderum .and he desided he liked those burgurs.he told his mom about them.
we sat and watched movies the rest of the evening.it was nice to have him here.

the next morning he desided to have me get dressed and we would go for another drive before he had to go.we drove down to the park and checked out the ducks that winter over.we sat for a while and watched them they were all around us.
then we headed down town where I had seen one of those new shops that have the cool clothes for kids.he went in to check it out. and was very happy when he came out.telling me about all cool stuff he was going to get when he got some money.

It did my heart good to know I had found some thing that blessed him.{guess I am good for some thing yet,if nothing more then using my eyes to bless others.}
we headed back to my place and he dropped me off cause it was getting late.it was a good time with the young man.Ill remmeber it as the day the blues went away.the day My sweet grandson came to stay.

Big sky country

My sweet grandson came to stay with me for the night.he called up thursday and said Na can I come stay with you.I was happy to hear he was coming.I was alittle afraid cause I had been feeling down so much that he wouldnt have a nice time.

but I said come and stay.he came friday about 4;oopm.we talked a while and I said Id get us some calvers burgurs.he desided we would go for a ride.he wanted to go to the water.he loves to fish.
I had to think where the water would be open.the ice was still on some of the lakes and rivers here yet.but I figured the river would be open.so off we went.I knew a spot where hubby and I use to go eat our lunch.
We drove along out of town and along where I told him I had lived before his mom was born.and his Auntie was only a baby.
the place doesnt look the same any more.its hard to see cause they put up a levee cause it use to flood.so you can hardly see the house.its high enough so it doesnt flood there.but I remember having to take a boat to get home there one spring.

We soon came to the parking lot by the river.it was a perfect day.we got out of his car and looked at the river.the sky was filled with the prettyest fluffy clouds.and the river mirrored the sky.it is so pretty.the wind was mild and it was just right for our time together.I told him to be careful,he had desided to go down the bank and it was snowy yet.

I said dont fall in cause Id never get to you as slow as Iam .and Id probbly end in the drink my self.we laughed.and I said I wouldnt be able to get back up the bank so we would be in deep trouble,and I didnt think he wanted to carry his old fat grandma.we laughed again.

He told me he would be ok and he headed down the bank.he said he backed his butt into a rose bush and guess that helped him go down the bank alittle faster.O ya that helps alot been there done that.I remember sitting down on a branch of it once with out knowing it was there.O yes I remember well.I was picking rose thorns out of my butt for days.

he got his fishing pole ready and I looked and thought it was the best picture.it was beautiful.{BIG SKY COUNTRY}the kid was enjoying himself.and me I was begining to feel the blues drift away.I sat there thinking of all the beauty around us.the crows flying over in sreach of food.the lovely clouds.the snow and the color of the river.and my sweet grandson.

life has come full circal,where once I took him on addventures he was now taken me.it was fun to see he loved me enough to come and take me for a ride.and to stay over night to keep me company.after all he is 17 and has friends of his own.and he could have done something with them.but he came to take his old NaNa for a drive.

Think Spring

this tree is in the park I go to.its all by its self in a bunch of other tree,s.it was in full bloom and so lovely the day I drove over there.I just had to stop and snape this picture.this was taken last year in the early spring.I will try to take some pictures this year Lord willing and share them with you.
this tree reminds me of me.Iam alone in the world.and the Lord still gives me my chance to bloom.so just cause you may feel alone or are alone ,you still bloom and add your beauty to the world.

was able to talk to "the kings daughter"my sister in law.she is a sweet girl.she lives in the big state of texas.she called to see if I was ok.its nice to know your loved.she is more like my little sister.and that is what I call her.she has a big job down there so keep her in your prayers.she headed to another state for a few days for her job.she is in the airforce.if you read this little sister I LOVE YOU,and you mean the world to me.

I also had a chance to talk to the hubby.he is still having problems.but seems to be moving on with his life nicely.he is looking for a job.not having much ease finding one thow.so pray for him.we talked a long time.and I told him about the junk I was dealing with.he had been praying for us when I called.

I dont like to dump things on him cause he has enough problems.so I didnt go into all the details.but its plain that Im on my own.but then I knew that.its just me and the Lord.hubby is going to be ok cause the Lord is helping him to.we both wonder why things ended as they did.I have a better Idia of why.but it still makes one want to know the whole story.one day Ill know it all.but for now I have to just trust the Lord.

THINK SPRING!!!!!

Hi Im back.Tg and me last year.

Hi everyone Im back with a smile on my face and a better out look then I have had for a few days.
the weekend started off good but then bad news.I was in no mood for more if you get my drift.I have had about all this old chic can stand.as you all know my mom passed away nov 22 ,and we are waiting for every thing to be worked out through the court.mom gave me her van.and so there is some junk going on with getting it signed over to me.well they were saying I couldnt drive it for this reason or that.considering I been driving it for months now.well I live alone.and have no one to drive me back and forth.my family lives in other towns.and they come this way very seldom.so needless to say this news messed up my mind let alone my emotions.how would I get any place.well I started to cry cause I just have had too much junk this last few months.

I had this feeling deep in side to just wait on the Lord.but I was thinking how do I get around.and if I cant at lest get out of the house what would I do?the few days before this I had been having problems finding reasons to be here on this earth any way.the winter, and being in had taken its toll.
I had been on others blogs and tired to help them through the cabin fever days of winter.and was doing well myself tell the bad news hit.well lets just say I was not in a real good place.my emotions took over and had it not been for the Lord.I may not have been back.

do you ever get to feeling like a scale?like someone keeps adding junk to one side and your already leening over the edge of a cliff and just one more pebble will through you over the edge.well that is how I felt.I cryed and turned to the Lord.could not take no more!!!I dragged my butt into the bedroom and got dressed.went down to the van and drove to the river,one of the parks I love.I sat over looking the river and just cryed.the Lord was there.and it was His love and comforting words that helped me. He promised me all would be ok.He said the Van was mine and He would work it out.I said Lord Ill be very honest with you.I dont really want to be here anymore.I dont have any reason to be.my marriage is over.Iam alone again,and dont have a real good reason for looking forward to the future.I would much rather be there with you.

I know Paul in the bible, went through this kind of thing and others who loved the Lord did to.the road gets long and dam hard some times.and you feel like what is the use?but the Lord said leave this in my hands and I will work it out.I sat there and though about all the mess of the last two years.I have lost so much and no one seems to understand just where Iam.they have their own lives and seem to think I can just carry this and always come up smiling.well its been dam hard!!!!!even with the Lords help its been a strugge to hang around.my one blogger friend was having the same problems.it scared me cause I know how easy it is to have feelings of ending it.its not that you want to die,its you want the problems to be gone.but emotions can get the best of you and make you think all kinds of junk.{I think of how hard it was on Anna Nicloe Smith.all she had been though.}

well I said on this blog I would be real and honest and share the truth with you.well I will not lie to you I thought about ending it.I have carryed too much and Iam tired.I love my family and I love the Lord.but some days or years have been more then I can take.when I had my kids to be there for there was no problem.I knew who I was and what I was here for.but now with the hubby gone and me wondering what the heck I am here for?it is hard to pick up and carry on.


I sat at the park and eat my lunch,as I waited on the Lord to help me.the river was breaking up and the ice was moving .two geeses flew over and landed in the open water just a few yards from me.the sound of them honking blessed me.the Lord knows I love geeses all most as much as the eagles.the air was mild so I left the window open.there were little birds singing.and the day was helping me have hope in good times to come with the Lord.

I watched people come to enjoy their break form work.a man and woman walked their dog.a van load of ladys came with their driver and walked and enjoyed the nice day.soon they all left and I was alone.I just wanted to feel happy for a change.its been years sence I have felt happy.I feel joy from the Lord at times. but I also have days that I wish I could crawl in a hole and pull the cover over my head and stay there.

little by little the feeling of sadness and fear left.and I could look at the beauty of the day and know that no matter how things looked now I would be able to go on.this was a day that God could work things out.even if it all looked other wise he was still in contral of my life.and He hadnt let me down yet so I knew he wouldnt now.

I have learned a few things in my walk with him.one big one is this.{when every thing looks hopeless,its a smoke screen the enemy throughs up to make you think that nothing will work out!!he does it cause he knows its going to work out but he wants to get you out of faith and douting.but the truth is {Good is just around the corner if you can just hang on.}

so this was a winter melt down for me.I said Id share the truth with you and I did.what is the moral of this story?
DONT WORRY ABOUT THINGS THAT HAVENT HAPPENED !!!!the Lawyar had said what would happen "if "the van got smashed up.Well that is a" what if!!!"its not a fact, its a question.a Idia that one has to put a "what if" in to the mix.{well Iam a believer in if it aint happened dont ask for it!!!!}cause if you spend your life worrying on "what if,s"!!!you will never enjoy life.people worry over things that never come to pass. and a" what if "lets the enemy cause you problems.

Jesus put it this way"dont take a thought "saying '.that means you may get dumb thoughts but why say them?
a thought could come in to your mind. {O what if I were to be responsible for some thing and someone else recked it?}well its a thought.and it hasnt happened,its only a thought.well you are worrying about some thing that hasnt even happened.life is full of what if,s.but you know they are just{ what if,s.}

Job said "the thing I greatly feared has come upon me."Job was a worry wort.and what he worryed about gave the enemy a open door to come in and mess him over.God restored to Job, all the enemy stole from him.but it wouldnt have happened in the first place if Job wouldnt have been worrying about "what if,s!! "

the Lord has gotten me this far.he pervides all my needs and pertects me.if the enemy trys to mess things up the Lord steps in.I get weak now and then.I get to feeling alone and lonely.and things wiegh heavy on me.but the truth is I have tryed to carry it instead of giving it to the Lord.well Lord this is yours.my mom would want me to have this van cause she loved me.we may not have always been close.but we still loved each other.and now she knows for sure that the things I did for her were out of love.how does she know?cause she is with Jesus and she knows all now.

so I aint going any place guys so dont freak!!!I just had a cabin fever melt down.brought on by "what if,s "and a big smoke screen.I will drive that van on my trip to where ever Jesus leads. and it will get me to where ever I need to go safely.I will have what my mom intended for me to have. her bills will all be payed and everone will recieve their share.God is in contral and its His job to handle some thing I cant.I will hang around for as long as he needs me here.and if its His will that I leave in the rapture or I go home some other way.one way or the other when its my time Jesus will come to get me.

all I can say is THINK SPRING!!!!cause I need to get out and enjoy the beauty Gods hands made.Have a blessed week.and thanks for reading.

here is a picture of hot balls Johnson.

isnt he a handsome guy?I could think of a better name for him but if he wants to be called HBJ thats his problem.love you TJ.
Id call you the preacher,or the word man,or the giant killer.or just my sweet grandson.love you alot.glad we got to talk today.
this was a fun day together,we need to do more addventures.

hummer at Anna,s window.

I can hardly wait for this time of year so I can take pictures again at Anna,s.she has humming birds that come to her feeders.I love to watch them.